Ok yeah I'm very mad and I'm not going to hide it. Mom called Dad yesterday morning and said my cousin called her. I don't know the full story cause honest I didn't want to hear it. Dad told me he called Mom and ask her for help. My Mom being Mom I guess she told him she would go pick him up. Mom is up in West Virginia right now with Mike and his family helping them with the coal mine tragedy. I went off on Dad when he told me that she going to pick my cousin up and bring him down here. It wasn't Dads fault but he was just the bad news teller. I did tell him later I was sorry for yelling at him he ask if I wanted to talk about it and I just don't not with them. I think personally this is a bad idea but I can't seem to get them to understand this.
That part of my family is bad news and bringing this boy in here just because he's gay is a bad idea. It could be a set up them trying to get news or whatever all I know is he's bad news just like the rest of them and I for one will not sit around here and watch. I told Tyler yesterday I didn't think I could stay with our cousin coming and it upset him. He told me you promised Ryan to stay until I was 100% again. So yeah that made me feel bad so I told him I would rent a motel room or something but couldn't stay in the same house as that boy. I know most of you going to be like my Mom and say give him a chance but you just don't know how this family has made me feel and my Uncle that I love very much. It's had sometime to turn the other cheek. All I know is I am very mad and very upset over this.
Later I'm gonna go push some kid down maybe trip an old person!
That part of my family is bad news and bringing this boy in here just because he's gay is a bad idea. It could be a set up them trying to get news or whatever all I know is he's bad news just like the rest of them and I for one will not sit around here and watch. I told Tyler yesterday I didn't think I could stay with our cousin coming and it upset him. He told me you promised Ryan to stay until I was 100% again. So yeah that made me feel bad so I told him I would rent a motel room or something but couldn't stay in the same house as that boy. I know most of you going to be like my Mom and say give him a chance but you just don't know how this family has made me feel and my Uncle that I love very much. It's had sometime to turn the other cheek. All I know is I am very mad and very upset over this.
Later I'm gonna go push some kid down maybe trip an old person!
I hope you are wrong about this boy, but you are probably right. It's a good thing you are around there to keep an eye on him. If he really needs help, your mom will help him. If he means to harm your family you'll be there to kick his ass back down the road.
I get so mad when a coal mine turns out to be letal. I think the greedy companies should be more careful with the human lives in their care. My nephew just applied for a job in an underground coalmine and my mom is more than scared for him. Ted
Maybe he's changed. Give it a try for a certain amount of time and if you still can't stand him, then leave. Try to keep and open mind for a week or so.
But I do know how you feel. I have cousins I'd rather not live with. I have one that's nothing but trouble. Always was and always has been.
What has your cousin actually done to you and your family? You may have told us, but I don't remember. I remember that your aunt has been terrible toward your side of the family, but I can't recall that he's done anything himself.
And don't you think that this whole business can be a turning point in his life — when he sees how good your side of the family is?
Just think of the pain your cousin has been hiding all these years. He didn't have the kind of family you did and he saw how his family acted when they found out about you. He COULDN'T come out. (Well, he could, but he wasn't ready to risk.)
You have a chance to step up and show him how to be a wonderful, giving, fantastic gay man by showing him the best of you.
Nothing they or he could do would matter as negativity always loses.
I said i wouldent comment on this so im not going to but i do wanna say stay strong bro keep your head up and watch your back!
-chris
I can understand your feelings on this.
I feel you have to trust you gut feeling and go with it.
Take care of urself and Ty.
Just be civil and keep a close
eye on him...I knew your mom would
keep her arms open and take him in
if he needed...No matter what he
said to her...She is the bigger
person on that side of the family
cause she never turns her back...
She has way to big of a heart...
Give her I say HI and give her a
hug for me...
Love you!
Laurie
Dude..., you feel how you feel, and no one has the rite to refute that. But, if he's as bad as you say, then leaving might be the wrong course of action. Especially with Ty coming home soon, personally I think you should be there, if for nothing more than to protect your brother from your cousin's attitude. I know you can be a bit of a hot head, and trust me, that's fine too, but in this case I think you need to stay close.
Octavius.
hmmm... if you look for the bad, that's all you will see.
One thing i learned long ago, if you don't ALLOW a person to change, than he WON'T be successful.
And how much harm can he do your uncle if ya don't talk about him?
i feel for ya coz i had a similar situation with a family member like ur aunt but it would help if u realized ur cousin is not ur aunt and i think its ur aunt that u dont like. sorry if im wrong but i just found ur blog and catching up on reading it
Ryan,
I won't presume to tell you what to do. But I hope to be able to give you some thoughts to help you work things out, like your other readers and followers have.
First, and most importantly, you need to be there for Tyler. You've always been there for him, and this is the time in his life that he needs you the most. Please stay for Tyler.
Secondly, people screw up in life, sometimes all the time throughout their whole life. But people can change, and deserve a second (and sometimes third and fourth) chance. I know your cousin and his family have been horrible to you and your uncle. I can't imagine the hurt and anger he has caused. But something must have changed with your cousin -- his situation, or his attitude, or both.
You told us that, when your mom first called your cousin to offer help, he basically told her and you and your family to f*ck off and die. But now, just a couple of weeks later, he is calling for help. His family must have disowned him and/or he realizes now he needs help. You have a suicide prevention link on your blog. Maybe your cousin is that desperate?
Your mom has kept up her offer to help and take your cousin in. She has lived a lot more life than you, and is a very wise and extremely kind-hearted person. So, maybe give her the benefit of the doubt? Or, if your cousin still is a bad apple, then (as others have noted on here), you should keep an eye out to protect your mom and family. Either way, you should stay.
Again, I don't presume to be able to tell you what to do. But hopefully, this will help you to work things out?
Take care, Ryan. I'm keeping you, Ty and your family in my prayers.
Les
duffmanrules@live.com