Tonight we had dinner with Kadin's grandma and I just love her she has always been nice to me. His parents are getting better but there still is something there I guess they don't trust me all the way yet even though we been together for over 3 years now. But his grandma has always welcome me with open arms and if she seen something she didn't like she tell me how it is.
So tonight she had us over for dinner like she normally does she normally has us over a couple times a month and we have her over for dinner and she always comes. But tonight she could feel something wasn't right so she finally said you boys going to tell me what's going on or do I have to get my boots on and kick it out of you. Kadin look at me and I looked and him and she said spill it boys.
So I spoke up and said Grandma Butler were having issue for the last couple weeks. She said okay what about? I said Kadin wants a baby and I'm not sure. She was quiet for a second then she said honey you don't want to have a baby it messes up your figure she said look at my ass I still haven't lost it from carrying all those babies. We both just laugh at here and I said well we don't have to worry about that.
Then she said look you boys do what you think is right but let me give you my 2 cents. I think you both should both think long and hard about it cause not everyone needs children in there life sometime they can do more good in the world if they don't have kids. Having kids can but a strain on your relationship and some people just can't make it through and they end up hating each other.
She said I seen this preacher on the Oprah show some time back and he said that gay people are God's chosen people and I believe that cause everytime I look you Kadin I know that God gave us a gift and being chosen by God maybe he didn't what you to have children. She said this is just my 2 cents and if you both want them then by all means have them. But look at you 2 right now your not happy and you been fighting over this just think about what I said okay?
We talked on the way home and I have to say we both felt a lot better than we have felt. We decided to talk some more this weekend about this and she gave us more think about. Grandma's are awesome and they put things in a different point of view to make you think. I am just so happy she is so open minded and that she loves Kadin so much that all she wants for him to be happy that's more than most parents do!
So tonight she had us over for dinner like she normally does she normally has us over a couple times a month and we have her over for dinner and she always comes. But tonight she could feel something wasn't right so she finally said you boys going to tell me what's going on or do I have to get my boots on and kick it out of you. Kadin look at me and I looked and him and she said spill it boys.
So I spoke up and said Grandma Butler were having issue for the last couple weeks. She said okay what about? I said Kadin wants a baby and I'm not sure. She was quiet for a second then she said honey you don't want to have a baby it messes up your figure she said look at my ass I still haven't lost it from carrying all those babies. We both just laugh at here and I said well we don't have to worry about that.
Then she said look you boys do what you think is right but let me give you my 2 cents. I think you both should both think long and hard about it cause not everyone needs children in there life sometime they can do more good in the world if they don't have kids. Having kids can but a strain on your relationship and some people just can't make it through and they end up hating each other.
She said I seen this preacher on the Oprah show some time back and he said that gay people are God's chosen people and I believe that cause everytime I look you Kadin I know that God gave us a gift and being chosen by God maybe he didn't what you to have children. She said this is just my 2 cents and if you both want them then by all means have them. But look at you 2 right now your not happy and you been fighting over this just think about what I said okay?
We talked on the way home and I have to say we both felt a lot better than we have felt. We decided to talk some more this weekend about this and she gave us more think about. Grandma's are awesome and they put things in a different point of view to make you think. I am just so happy she is so open minded and that she loves Kadin so much that all she wants for him to be happy that's more than most parents do!
Ryan,
I'm really happy to see that you and Kadin are communicating a LOT about this HUGE decision you are confronting. Whether you decide to adopt children now or later on in life, it's good to air the feelings and come to a mutually acceptable conclusion. Having family like a wise old grandmother to help, and being able to be open with her I think shows your maturity and commitment to each other as you struggle with this. I have no doubt that you will find the right answer that will strengthen your relationship, and allow you two to be the best couple you can be to and for each other.
Peace <3
Jay
True love mostly finds a way to make things easier, even from grandmothers :)
You guys are blessed to have Grandma Butler on your side. Pay attention to what she says as it comes in love.
Remember that if it is meant to happen the right doors will open easily. Things will fit into place they way they are meant to.
That's just awesome :) I think that by the time you get to be a grandparent, your perspective on the world changes. She reminds me of my dad's mom hearing how she talked. And you're right, Grandmas Rock! :D
This shows one of the good things when people accept gay relatives and friends. It makes it possible for them to give advice and the gay relative or friend knows it comes with love.
I'm glad you're continuing to talk about it, since it's so important.
Kadin's Grandmother sounds like a really amazing person & a very wish one too...you are both so lucky to have her in your lives.
I'm glad you & Kadin are still talking about the having a baby thing...communication & being able to listen to each others concerns are important and I'm sure things will work out no matter what you decide.
Have a great day Ryan :)
that was supposed to be a very wise one too...lol
It's a different relationship with grandparents...a better one I think.
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