On the way to work this morning I was flipping through my Sirius radio and Cher's Believe song came on of course being a Cher fan I was jamming out to it then I notice on the display that it peek at number 1 in 1999. That threw me for a loop I didn't realize that it had been that long since the song came out. It also got me thinking what I was doing in 1999 and the memories started flooding in. I was playing baseball back then and was on a swim team. I was trying to think what was important to me back then and how I never thought my life would turn out the way it did.
I was talking with my friend Ryan Field the other day he had a post about how things use to be as a writer and using a type writer. I told him I remember keeping a diary and how I still have it. But then blogging came along and it was easier ti write my feeling here and have been for 7 or 8 years now. Back in 99 I thought about boys yes was having sex when I could yeah for those that have been following know I started early when it came to sex. But this post anit about sex its about remembering what I was dealing with 10 years ago.
I remember I wanted more than anything to grow up and be a baseball player that's what I wanted and wrote about it a lot in my diary. Even though swimming was easier for me and I was good at it I didn't like it that much. I wanted to be a baseball player and play for the Atlanta Braves that was my dream of course it didn't happen a lot happen in a few years between the ages of 12 and 16. I did finish with my swimming but drop out of baseball cause being gay the team couldn't handle it. It's a long story I may write about it someday I have in the past.
Reason for this post is I guess me just having flashbacks on when I was a kid and now I think about it the shit I worried about back then really was a waste of time but I guess back then it was on top of my list. Am I sad how things turn out and how I didn't get to become what I really wanted? I would say no I am for the most part happy and I love what I'm doing working with animals I love animals. I'm happy that my brother lives with me gives me a chance to see what it's like to be a dad. For the most part I am happy with my life I would change a few paths along the way if I could but I have to learn life lessons along the way right?
Got to leave you with this today!
I was talking with my friend Ryan Field the other day he had a post about how things use to be as a writer and using a type writer. I told him I remember keeping a diary and how I still have it. But then blogging came along and it was easier ti write my feeling here and have been for 7 or 8 years now. Back in 99 I thought about boys yes was having sex when I could yeah for those that have been following know I started early when it came to sex. But this post anit about sex its about remembering what I was dealing with 10 years ago.
I remember I wanted more than anything to grow up and be a baseball player that's what I wanted and wrote about it a lot in my diary. Even though swimming was easier for me and I was good at it I didn't like it that much. I wanted to be a baseball player and play for the Atlanta Braves that was my dream of course it didn't happen a lot happen in a few years between the ages of 12 and 16. I did finish with my swimming but drop out of baseball cause being gay the team couldn't handle it. It's a long story I may write about it someday I have in the past.
Reason for this post is I guess me just having flashbacks on when I was a kid and now I think about it the shit I worried about back then really was a waste of time but I guess back then it was on top of my list. Am I sad how things turn out and how I didn't get to become what I really wanted? I would say no I am for the most part happy and I love what I'm doing working with animals I love animals. I'm happy that my brother lives with me gives me a chance to see what it's like to be a dad. For the most part I am happy with my life I would change a few paths along the way if I could but I have to learn life lessons along the way right?Got to leave you with this today!
Nice post...From what I've seen, you've always moved forward, Ryan. And I think that's important. XXX
Ryan,
I've recently started following your posts. I'd like to go back and read them from the beginning. Is there any way you could setup archive links by year?
Keep up all the good work you do.
Ryan,
I was thinking about what I missed out on from when I was a kid. I always wanted to play baseball for the Cubs! That being said I found a way to still play and that is through the midwest suburban baseball league. I am playing adult league baseball, and I know this league is represented throughout the country. If you still you think you have baseball in you look into it.
Matt
Awesome! It's good to reflect on the past. Myself, i wish life had turned out different, but i wasnt really prepared for all the turmoil and wrong turns. But writing about it, helps.
I remember reading your previous blog after loosing contact during two days to get "up to date" again (I lost 3 years I guess) & I still remember how impressed I was. I am so glad you can say you're happy with your life right now. Good luck.
God, 1999. I was 27, living with a militant dyke and a dick-wheeling hetero pig and I was a techno queen. My gosh, I couldn't...nor would I want to...go back to those days.
It's what we were that makes us who we are. Thanks for the post. It was fun to reminisce.