What a Week

What a week so far huh? What started out for me to be a bad week really is turning out ok. Me and Kadin are getting along great and with our talk we had I think things will only get better. I think keeping things from each other (me more than him but he did have a couple secrets) is not a good thing and will only hurt the other when it's found out and I believe it always comes out somehow someway. Now it's like a clean plate and there were things I liked he didn't and I didn't know cause he never told me he just went along to make me happy sometimes that's a good thing but not always. Anyway we are the right track now and I think it will only get better. I also am a true believer in space and think we all need alone time from people we love and if they love you they understand this and there has to be trust if there is no trust then I believe the love will never last.

I was ask yesterday by a friend about my drinking he just wanted to understand it and I think I need to clear the air on that it seems if you read my post I sound like I drink all the time when in fact I don't. I don't even drink on a daily basis but sometimes I do like to have a drink sometimes just a shitty day at work I come home maybe have a beer or a rum and coke but only one. Most weekends go by and I don't drink at all then some weekends I do. It may seem everytime I get with Reed it's a party well sometimes it is but it's not like I see him every weekend I bet I see him maybe 4 to 6 times a year if I'm lucky yeah I do wish I could see him everyday we grew up together so yeah he's like my brother. But sometimes when we see each other we don't drink at all. Just this time with his week off we plan our vacation together and let's face it for those that do drink from time to time your on vacation your gonna have a few your on vacation right? So understand please I don't have a drinking problem just like to have one now and then and trust me if I did my Mom would be down here so fast I wouldn't have a chance to drink anything.

About the drag queen post there were emails and comments I got that I didn't publish and more emails bitching that I didn't publish the comments people it's like this ask anybody that's been reading my blog they will tell you also I am all about freedom of speech even if I don't agree with what is being said. But one thing I will not put up with is hate period! Some of you feel I was hating on the drag queens well go back and read the post cause I wasn't and wouldn't I just don't understand and never will. I did not go in looking for a fight I ask many times for this drag queen to stop touching me after a while if a person don't listen then you need to do something to get there attention so if it look like I turn toward hitting then you needed to be there and when someone says stop touching me then stop touching just like no means no.

Last thing sorry for the long post but I got a ton of shit running thru my head. I want to talk to a friend of mine that reads this no names needed I am not calling anyone out but when someone your in love with and they say they love you hit you on a daily basis that's not love ok. Please understand I know what lonely is and I understand the fear of being alone but no one deserves to be hit and if he truly loves you he would never hit you. Beating you up cause you said something he didn't like and then next sends you flowers to make it right it's not right. Honey please get out why you can there is places and people that will help you I am one of them. Domestic violence is no good in any community gay or str8 please get out my house is open to you and you know that. There is no man on earth that is all that and worth it if he hits you and trust me even if you don't have a man your never alone you have friends that love you.

GLBT Domestic Violence Info
Domestic Violence in GLBT Community

I am so looking forward to a quiet and alone time with Kadin this weekend.
Later from Florida!!!!!!!!
11 Responses
  1. Anonymous Says:

    I love you Baby Boy...

    Love ALWAYS!!!!


  2. Carl Says:

    Hitting someone is never OK. NEVER! How can you say you love someone and then hit them.

    Your freind needs to get out of the relationship now. It will only get worse. It will never get better.

  3. naturgesetz Says:

    That is very good advice you gave your friend. I hope he's reading this because I want to tell him you're right. He should escape from the guy who hits him. And I do mean escape. He's in danger, and he needs to leave.

    The guy will probably promise to change, but he can't because it's a sickness he has. He'll probably keep trying to get your friend back, but your friend shouldn't go back. The guy may even begin stalking your friend. He needs to be ready to go to the police at the first sign of danger.

    And he definitely should look at the links you posted.

    The sooner he's out of that relationship the better (and the safer he'll be).

  4. Reddecatur Says:

    Great post Ryan....have a good weekend!

  5. I drink much like you, not every day or even every week but if i'm going through a trying time, I may have a few at home and I love social drinking!

    Darlington ... just sayin' :) :) You don't owe anyone an explanation but if you want to clear the air by all means.

    and it is NEVER okay for someone to hit their partner male/female/transgender whatever. That can never be said enough!

  6. ryan field Says:

    I enjoy the long posts. I like reading them.

  7. Dave Says:

    Love ya my little soldier. Making me proud every day that im your friend. Stick to what you know and I think you'll be fine. I was soo happy you and kadin are still together. True love, in all purposes, can overcome alot when theres communication.
    And Kadin, take of ryan for all of us. There are many people who love and care about him.

    Kisses and tickles,

  8. markus Says:


    do you want to borrow my shirt

    i found your blog via gomad.ch


  9. What you write is tough stuff, but it’s good, and your caring part is really impressive, you’re just a special person.

  10. markus Says:

    btw instead of mixing your rum with coke try it with fruit juice, i'm like you don't drink that often but when i do tropical fruit juice and rum is the thing

  11. Mark Says:

    Dude, I agree on drag queens. Some of them can be really fun to hang out with, but I'm attracted to men. Don't confuse my friendliness with attraction. and if you do that still doesn't give you the right to touch me. It's called assault, check out the law!