I'm Damaged

I got an email the other day I wanted to take a couple days and reread it a few times before I wrote about it make sure I got my thoughts and feelings right. I'm not going to post the email I don't want to give the guy who wrote it that much credit than what I'm going to give in this post. Pretty much he was ripping me apart for being a sell out from what I gathered from the email.

He was upset that I posted naked guys on my blog this was the littlest thing he was bitching about. Let me say this he claims he has been a reader for a long time and if this was the case he should know I have posted naked guys before on here before and trust me I will do it again. I make it clear that it's not a porn blog I like male nudity I think its beauty and when I want to share it I will post it.

The biggest thing was he thinks I'm damaged he did go back and read my blog I have to give him credit for that. This is why he thinks I'm damage I did a post a long time ago about my first time and how I was a little kid. For those who don't know let me bring you up to speed on this. I had a babysitter a boy from the neighborhood I was 9 he was 16 and I was in awe of this boy thought he was the hottest thing ever.

I want to make it crystal clear he did not come on to me it was I who came on to him. Yes maybe he should have know better but when your dealing with someone like me that don't take no for an answer well the boy didn't have a chance really. When I finally see him naked omg I was in heaven it was so big to me and when I found what it did I was in love!

There is more to this story but you have to go and find it in this blog past sorry but that's life. I do want to say this before I finish about this guy and his email. I do not think that having sex with a child is ok and I think if a man has sex with a child his dick should be cut off! Saying that I do think some kids are different than others and I know I was I knew when I was 5 years old that I like boys and I knew that playing with myself felt good!

My parents knew what had happen and they were upset but my parents listen to me and I thank them for that I told them it was me who started it and not him and I didn't want him to get into trouble. I wasn't allowed to see him anymore but they understood and of course it just got worse from there when it came to me and having sex.

This is where the guy says I'm damaged that this boy raped me and made me a sexaholic. He says me posting about sex and jacking off and getting fucked by Kadin all the time is cause I'm damaged and it comes from my childhood me posting guys naked is cause I'm damaged and I need to get help for my sexual behavior before I hurt myself or someone else.

Let me say this anit we all damaged in someway? Really I want to make this crystal clear what happen when I was a child has nothing to do with my sexual behavior now. I like to have sex ok I like to cum I love making love to my boyfriend Kadin but I also like to have a nice wank too I love porn and if that makes me damaged then I guess I am. But really who is damaged here me for getting some or you for not getting some?

Not to change the topic love to here your thoughts on this but there is some friends of mine who just open a store a few months ago I want to throw out a shout out and put there link on here a little about them.........

6S Boutique is a Stage Performer's Boutique.
We are a "One Stop Boutique" selling entertainer's necessities such as Make-up, Wigs, Rhinestones, Adhesives and more!

We also do fabulous Custom Swavorski Rhine-stoning and Repair on clothing (Gowns, Suits, Costumes), shoes, jewelry and more!

They have some really cool stuff you could wear everyday not just for performing and some really cool rainbow jewelry so go check them out and buy something lets help them make it we need to support business in our community!

Sending Hugs to Sasha & Andrew Good Luck with the Boutique!


15 Responses
  1. Jay Ross Says:

    Well maybe I'm sick also because I really like your blog and you don't mince words. This guy has major problems, but maybe he's just jealous. If what you post upsets him so much why doesn't he unfriend you? Nobody is forcing him to read your posts. Meanwhile, keep up the great job.


  2. ryan field Says:

    This makes me mad. The e-mail that idiot sent you is far more damaging than anything in your past.

    I get a little tired of these bleeding hearts, the Dr. Phil types, who are always telling us what's right and what's wrong.

    My grandmother was married at 15 years old and remained married for the next sixty years to my grandfather. My grandather was twenty-one at the time. Does that make my grandmother damaged? If anyone had said something like this to her, she would have mopped the floors with them. Nowadays, with all these PC left-winger loons around telling us what to eat, what to drive, what to wear, my grandfather could have been arrested for marrying a 15 year old.

    You're right, Ryan, we're all a little damaged in one way or another. And it all depends on our personal cricumstances. But don't pay attention to e-mails like that. There's always someone who thinks they know it all.


  3. Polt Says:

    Was this guys expressing concern for you that were damaged, or judging you because you were damaged. The only reason I ask is how he meant it would determine the tone I would use in responding to him.

    Nonetheless, regardless of his intent, my thought is, fuck him. he doesn't know you, he's not walked in your footsteps. And, if it was concern he was expressing, it's admirable that he's worried about you, but really, it's none of his business. If what you post bothers him so much, he quite free to not visit here again.

    Other than that, I say ignore the guy and live your life. It's you life, not his. Enjoy however you makes you happiest, regardless of whether someone thinks you're damaged or not.

    HUGS....


  4. FOGGY Says:

    This is for Mr. Ryan Field :

    WHY....WHY...WHY do you assume that all "politically correct loons" are "left-wingers" ?

    I anxiously await your reply.

    ........Very Respectfully,
    ................... "FOGGY".........


  5. Eric Says:

    He is a complete idiot for sure. A person is not "damaged" because he likes sex, gay or straight, or because he likes porn. We all have incidents that happened to us as kids. Mine have been buried deep in my subconscious, but I think I turned into a decent, nice and empathetic man. I would sure not take anything he says to heart, he is probably demented deeply himself!


  6. Eric Says:

    Yeah Ryan Field, I am a "left-winger" and I believe in equal rights for all adults, freedom of speech and expression and I think this guy was a "loon." I could care less what you or anyone wears, eats, or who you or anyone sleeps with as long as that person is consenting and an adult.

    The "right-wingers" are the ones hung up on telling us that gays are bad, that we can't marry who we wish and that we are going to hell. They are far more dangerous to a supposed democracy than are those on the left who have "bleeding hearts!"


  7. jimm Says:

    umm... gee Ry, I guess your whole nature-loving family must be damaged. j/k of course.

    ah well, we're all damaged in some way or another. Soon enough, watching porn will seem like the norm. how many 18-20somethings watch porn while jacking with their friends now? and sexting,too? not to mention camming.


  8. ryan field Says:

    "WHY....WHY...WHY do you assume that all "politically correct loons" are "left-wingers" ?"

    I said, "all these," as a collective phrase. Not everyone. I'm sure some are very decent folks.

    "The "right-wingers" are the ones hung up on telling us that gays are bad, that we can't marry who we wish and that we are going to hell."

    You've obviously never heard of The Log Cabin Club, a national organization for gay men, and a conservative group focused on equal rights, gay marriage, and freedom of speech.


    "I could care less what you or anyone wears, eats, or who you or anyone sleeps with as long as that person is consenting and an adult."

    Thank you. I feel the same way :)


  9. Mind Of Mine Says:

    I don't think it is unusual to watch a lot of porn, masturbate often and have regular sex. We are male after all.

    I relate so much to being sexually curious at 9 years old, I only wish I had met the same circumstances that you did :).

    I remember from about 6 or 7 and fantasizing about essentially bottoming and knowing it would be very pleasurable.


  10. FOGGY Says:

    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question.
    I will never ask a republican another question...............


  11. ryan field Says:

    For the record, in case you're talking about me, Foggy. I'm actually a registered Democrat, not a republican, but always vote independent, according to issues. Not that there's anything wrong with republicans. I have many gay friends who are both republican and democrat.


  12. CreamedHoney Says:

    'No Man is an Island'

    No man is an island entire of itself; every man
    is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
    if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
    is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
    well as any manner of thy friends or of thine
    own were; any man's death diminishes me,
    because I am involved in mankind.
    And therefore never send to know for whom
    the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.

    John Donne

    Each of us is a product of our own history. That you are such a kind,empathetic and interesting
    person speaks well of you. Keep the faith!

    Martin in Kentucky


  13. elise Says:

    I'd say that pissant e-mailer is not getting enough. Or any.
    Too bad, fella. Safe, consensual sex is a normal, healthy part of life, to be enjoyed and celebrated!


  14. I'm not going to support the person that sent you the email Ryan, but I did want to say that he has a right to feel and think that way.

    Yes, we ARE all damaged in one sense or another. If we weren't, I really don't think that we'd be human.

    The thing is, what we feel is right and what "is" right are totally subjective. Right for me may be wrong for you and vice versa...so that was just one guy's opinion and how he feels.

    And some folks have a high libido, some folks don't. Sounds like yours is higher than mine and you like to use it :D

    And THAT is perfectly fine and normal :)


  15. Eric Says:

    Ryan Field...I am on your side so I don't want to start a big thing but one point on what you said about the right-wing and Republicans:

    "You've obviously never heard of The Log Cabin Club, a national organization for gay men, and a conservative group focused on equal rights, gay marriage, and freedom of speech."

    Yes I have heard of the Log Cabin Club many times. They are a good group, but the question is how do they and other gay people find a home in a party that wants to deny us the same rights every straight person has? All you need to see is the current lineup of nutcases the Republican Party is putting up for President.

    Bachmann even said she will "reinstate Don't Ask, Don't Tell," and Perry wants to make sure the sodomy laws in Texas are reinstated nationally. No room for us in that homophobic bunch!

    Anyway...hugz to you both Ryans.