Ryan's Life

Halloween is on the top of the holidays it starts all the fun holidays. First you have Halloween to get the party started then you have Thanksgiving a time to spend with family and friends then onto Christmas more fun with family and friends and then wrap the party up with New Years really love this time of year!

I am a big fan of scary movies hard to pick a favorite cause I like all them even the old black and white ones are cool. But this time of year I have to give props to Halloween and Michael Myers what and awesome slasher movie I like all of them but my favorite out of the series would be the first one and Halloween H20 I think they were the best.

I just wonder what Michael would have thought if he walked in on something like this? Think maybe he just needed a little sex and he wouldn't been so pissed maybe?


Happy Halloween!

First off I want to say thanks for all the comments on the post below and your thoughts on that topic I will keep you updated on the meeting and what we decide to do. There was a couple comments that kinda pissed me off a little but I'm going to let it go cause I did ask for your thoughts good or bad so it would be two faced of me to bring up negative comments. So again thanks for your thoughts on the topic.



Okay I want to do a little post about a great singer and songwriter and business lady and I'm a big fan of hers Ms Dolly Parton. I just love her she tells it the way it is and how she feels about things and if you don't like it oh well she won't lose sleep over it. She is a great songwriter just listen to her songs and yes she has written most of her own songs. Most of them have to do with her childhood of something she's been through in life and they just are heart warming make you cry type songs. From one of your biggest fans Dolly your awesome and loved by many thanks for all you do!

Last week Kadin and I got into this big fight to the point where it got pretty heated and a lot of yelling back and forth. Now some people would say couples do this all the time but you have to understand we never have got into a fight like this. We've had disagreements in the pass but nothing as bad as this all the telling and sleeping in different rooms just killed me inside.

I know your asking what could have been so bad that it ended up into this big fight. Well with Kadin's ok he said I could post about it cause he wanted to see what everyone else thought. So please give us your thoughts on this don't matter who you side with I'm not going to come down on you or anything like that just need your thoughts.

Kadin has these friends there lesbians now there no problem there cause there good people and I like them also and they have always treated me good. The problem is they came over and they wanted to know if we could work together for making kids? I was like what do you mean? They said they would both get pregnant with mine and Kadins sperm but they wouldn't tell us who used who's.

They also said that they would give us one baby and they would keep one but didn't want the kids to know who the other parent was. Like if whatever baby we got wouldn't know that one of these girls was there mom or theres wouldn't know if me or Kadin was the dad. I had a problem with this I didn't think it was right that the kids should know and the kids should be treated like siblings.

They are totally against this and said they wouldn't go through with it unless we agree. Kadin wants a baby really bad and I told him I would want to know who's sperm was used and I would want the baby to know who there mom was. And if I'm being honest I'm not sure I want to raise a kid now I did want to a few years ago but now I'm not sure. Well Kadin got pissed at me and we fought over this and still haven't come to a conclusion yet.

I know this weekend the girls are coming over for dinner and were going to discuss it more. I think this is good maybe they had time to think on it. Kadin is worried cause he thinks they will change there mind and pick another couple to do. I told him I would want to know what one is mine just incase of health issues and I don't see why we can't raise one and they raise one but we be in each other lives. Am I wrong?

This is the reason I live in Florida this is what are winters are mainly like! Yeah you can hate me now before your ass deep in snow! haha



Okay Kadin's mom fixes this potato soup and it's like his favorite and I want to try to fix some this weekend so anybody got some good tater soup receipts let me hear them!

Later!

Last week I got an email from someone in my past I was shocked when I first seen the name and then got a little pissed thought what could he want from me. I ask Kadin to read it first and if it had to do with hate or with bullying then I didn't want to see it. So he read it and said I think you should read it. So I sit down and I read it and boy did I get a shock before I go into the email I need to tell you a little about the person who wrote it.

Back in school I was bullied I've wrote about this before I just haven't really went into details on it. This event I'm talking about happen back in the 6th grade. It was a new school year and I was the chosen one to be picked on being short back then wearing hearing aids and glasses I was the prime pick for the school bullies. Being called four eyes, queer, retard, fag was a daily thing for me besides the punching and whatever else they wanted to do.

A couple weeks went by and we had this new kid start and the attention went off of me and on to this kid. He was chunky kid and boy did the bullies pick on that and ran with it. I felt sorry for this kid but deep down also I was glad he came cause it took them off me. I knew it was wrong to feel this but I did. Life got hard for this kid and the bullies never stopped I would see this kid and the sad look in his face but I didn't do anything to stop them from attacking him.

One day at lunch I was sitting alone like I always did and I didn't see this kid or the bullies. I was eating lunch when they walked in and came right to my table and started messing with me one of them took my tomato juice and dump it on my head. They all laughed and walked away the teacher who was a bitch came over and all she said was go clean yourself up she seen what happen but didn't do a damn thing about. I heard later she got fired for not stopping kids from bullying.

Anyway I went to the bathroom to clean the juice off my head and clothes and I heard someone crying so I walk over to the stall and there was Todd the chunky kid sitting on the floor crying. I ask him what's wrong he looked up at me said I can't take it anymore Ryan I just can't take it they made me lick the toilet I just can't take it anymore. I could see the look in his eyes I knew he was thinking about doing something bad to himself and I said Todd please don't do whatever your thinking I can fix this.

He ask how can you fix this they pick on you too. I said I'll think of something and I did! I came up with a way to get them off of Todd and back on me I knew I could handle it I knew I had the strength that Todd and many other kids didn't have to get through the bullying. I told Todd if you want these guys to stop fucking with you then you have to pick a fight with me. He said he couldn't do that and I said do you want to keep getting pick on?

The next at lunch Todd came in with a different look on his face I knew he thought about it and game was on. He came up to me and said give me your lunch I said no he called me some names and said give it to me and by this time other kids were looking at us. He said he was going punch me in the face if I didn't give up my lunch and I said no by then the bullies were standing behind him telling him yeah hit the queer.

I knew Todd didn't have it in him to hit me I could see the look on his face and I knew he didn't want to. Todd said I cant hit him he has glasses on one of the bullies smack me said he don't know so punch him. Todd was almost at tears I look at him said do it Todd do it! Bam he hit me hard and I fell on the ground then one of the bullies said stomp on his glasses and Todd did. From that day on they never picked on Todd again.

The following year Todd was gone I heard his dad transfer again with his job. I never really talked to him again after that day I think maybe he wanted too but was scared if the bullies found out they would go back to picking on him so he just never did talked to me again. That was until last week when I got an email from him.

He said he been trying to find me and finally found my facebook and had to email me. He said that day he hit me has haunted him for years and they hell I went through after that day. He wanted to apologize for putting all that hate on me and wanted to tank me also cause he didn't think he could have made it a few more days if I didn't stick up for him. He told me that what I did for him meant the world to him and believes he is alive today cause of me.

He hopes that I could forgive him for being a coward and for the hell I went through cause he wasn't man enough to take it. I wrote him back gave him the link to this blog told him I would write about and would have my responses on here. So Todd I forgave you the day it happen and I never felt any anger or hate toward you I felt we both did what we had to do to survive. I don't think your a mean person I didn't think that back then and I don't think that now.

Thank you for looking me up and for telling me sorry. Glad things turn out good for you and them punks that bullied us back then yeah well they didn't amount to much now did they? All is forgiven Todd we made it!

This past weekend was one of the best I've had in a very long time. It was Kadin's first weekend off in like forever I mean the whole weekend. We went out again on a couple date nights we haven't done that since we started dating a few years ago and I have to say it was awesome! He picked one night on where we went for dinner and what we did after and I picked the next night like I said it was awesome! I didn't think it was possible but I totally fell deeper in love with him. I know there is a God cause he blessed me with the most amazing man in the world!

We got to talk a lot also something we haven't done in a very long time. I mean just sit and talk without phones, facebook and everything else that seem to take up our times. One thing that we discuss was facebook and how much I am on there and such and I didn't think about it but I am on there a lot and I think it may have hurt this blog. It was easier just to say what I wanted on there than to do a post. So I'm going to be backing off a little on facebook and focus on this blog and my family a little more. No I'm not stopping just won't be posting a lot of facebook just every now and them.

I want to close today with my respects to Dan Wheldon family and friends and to all those Indy racing fans. Don't matter if your a Nascar fan like me or Indy or Formula one fan we all feel this lost. Dan and his family didn't live that far from me and I got to meet him once at a bagel shop in downtown St Pete he was a really good guy and this sport will miss him!

God Speed Dan!
Dan and his Wife Susie.

I do it for the love of animals the fact no matter how bad they are treated they still want to show love. I feel my calling was to work at this shelter and I would do it for free. What is unconditional love? Look at your dog or cat and you will find your answer!Have a Great Weekend!

WE HAVE A WINNER!!!! CONGRATS JIMM SEND ME AN EMAIL!!

Okay to win the rainbow disco ball for your auto be the first one to answer these questions right and it's yours! Either leave a comment here of email me the answers to ryryt87@yahoo.com and please put the date and time on your response so I can make sure the right person gets the prize! So you know all the answers to these questions have been in the blog over the last 8 years!


Good Luck!

1. Where did Kadin and I meet?
2. How many siblings do I have?
3. Where are my parents from?
4. Other than Reed and Jeff who is my favorite Nascar driver?
5. Who was the first boy I had sex with?

Had a really good weekend just wish it would have been longer. Saturday Kadin and I went horseback riding it's been a while for me and I was wanting to do it. We get out there and they were calling for rain all day but so far nothing we decided to go riding anyway. So we picked out the horses we wanted and off we went. Of course we get about half a mile away and the sky opens up we didn't care we just rode in the rain!

We get back home soak and wet take off what clothes we had on in the garage and I couldn't handle myself Kadin look so damn good standing there butt ass naked. So we started making out right there and oh damn it was feeling so good then the garage door open it was Tyler and his friends coming in so yeah there we were on the hood of the truck naked getting it on. Tyler was like damn you have a room his friends were like hot dudes!

Saturday night was going great then we get a phone call from one of Kadin's friends ask if we could come pick him up he was at 7-11 using the pay phone. First thing why is he at 7-11 using a pay phone when he has a cell phone and why anit he driving over here himself. Found out the answers when we pulled up. Him and his boyfriend had been in another fight yes I used the word another.

This time it was a little worse than just words it got physical. Once we got him back to the house and he told his story I wanted him and Kadin did also wanted him to call the police but he wouldn't do it. They been together for a year I guess and it's been rough from the start I told him that nobody has the right to lay a hand on you no matter how mad or how much you think you screw up nobody has the right to hit you.

I told him me and Kadin been into so good fights but they were just words and even thought the words hurt we never raised a hand to each other and never will. I'm not going to go into much details cause its his story not mine to tell. Just know he got out and Kadin is putting him on a plane back home today! But thinking about it and being around it before with a few friend this happens a lot not only with women but with men also and I think gay domestic violence is coming more common.

Look people love is not being hit or beat up by your partner ok, Love is not being scared to talk or to voice your thoughts. Love is not being used just for sex. Nobody has the right to lay a hand on you no matter what and if your boyfriend hits you that's not love ok! There are people that can help you but the smartest thing to do is get out don't stay and keep getting abused ok trust me they say they never will do it again but they do and it gets worse and no matter what they say that's not love!

Here is a couple links if you find yourself needing help!




Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgendered Domestic Violence

One day next week I will have some kind of contest to give away this rainbow disco ball. It's 2" around and can hang anywhere I have one hanging from my rearview mirror Kadin does also. But I will be giving one away for free no strings or anything attach won't cost you one red cent it will be totally free shipping also. Check in next week for more details on how to win this rainbow disco ball!
Have a Fabulous Weekend!

Okay yall know me and know I love porn think it's the best thing on the market today! But saying that I think there is a time and a place for it and in a car at the drive thru at mcdonalds is not the place for it. Yes you read that right this morning I am sitting in the drive thru and this car in front of me has a porno playing. I am like oh no he don't have a porno tape on this early in the morning and in car that rims cost more than the car!

Now these dvd players in vehicles I think were put there to keep kids in check while traveling. Just like everything else people will use them for other things but porn in public I have an issue with this. See this is why nudity in public is look at as a bad thing cause stupid people do stupid stuff. I have no problem with sex outside I like it myself but as long as it's in a private place and where no kids will see.We make nudity a bad thing cause first thing people think of when they see someone naked is sex. Nudity should be a beautiful thing the human body should be look at as beauty but cause of the way we were brought up we make the human body a nasty thing. Then we have idiots like this guy this morning driving around with porn on his dvd player. I guess it is what it is and public nudity will happen with different causes or where its allowed.
Maybe I would feel totally different if the porn the guy was watching was gay porn instead of straight porn! lol

When I was younger I use to write poems a lot. Some I posted on here years ago but for some reason I just stopped. No reason why really they just stopped coming to me like they did when I was younger. But last night while I was in the shower one came to me just out of the blue and I had to jump out of the shower to write it down.

Then this morning after I got back from the dentist I was checking my email and a friend of mine Sam said he thought about me Saturday night and had to draw what was in his mind. He said he had this vision in his head of me in a shower now how strange is that? Oh here is my Poem and Sam's drawing. Let me know what you think?

I see the flames spreading everywhere
through the smoke I see him standing there
I hold him in my arms so tight
I close my eyes a cool breeze blows
across our naked bodies in the dark.

Outside his reach is my concern
Somewhere I know a fire burns
Through the smoke I see him standing there
In his arms I feel safe and secure
I close my eyes as the cool breeze blows.