Ryan's Life

and....

The first is a building on campus and the second, well, isn't. Also, I met our new undergraduates today. Generations of undergraduates are usually definable in some way, e.g., post war, England's world cup victory year, moon walk, etc etc. This lot are defined by not being alive when the ThunderCats finished its tv run. Poor things, they've not had a childhood :-)

Right, I'm off: that beer isn't going to drink itself without proper attention now is it? *hugs*

“Grief can destroy you--or focus you. You can decide a relationship was all for nothing if it had to end with you alone. Or you can realize that every moment of it had more meaning than you dared to recognize at the time, so much meaning it scared you, so you just lived, just took for granted the love and laughter of each day, and didn't allow yourself to consider the sacredness of it. But when it's over and you're alone, you begin to see it wasn't just a movie and dinner together or worrying over a high electric bill. It was everything, it was the why of life, every event and precious moment of it. The answer to the mystery of existence is the love you shared sometimes so imperfectly, and when the loss wakes you to the deeper beauty of it, to the sanctity of it, you can't get off your knees for a long time, you're driven to your knees not by the weight of the loss but by gratitude for what preceded the loss. And the ache is always there but one day not the emptiness, because to nurture the emptiness, to take solace in it, is to disrespect the gift of life.”This quote came from a book call Forever Odd I haven't read this book yet but I order it I should have it Wednesday. Thanks Carl!!!!

Just click on the book to order it or get details about it!

Later from Tampa Bay!

Have you ever felt like this? I do a lot when I was in school and even 2 this day. It's funny when your out having a good time and someone says something 2 knock you down. Sorry for such a down post on the weekend.

Later from Florida!

So my day started off with a bit of a gay cliche when I dropped the soap in the shower; and in other bathroom harlotry related news it turns out that the children's bubblebath character Mer Matey has realised a life ambition and had a threesome with twins. Lucky bitch.






As you may know we're rolling out an ID card scheme in the UK in the near future which will contain biometric data. Obviously this issue has generated a certain amount of controversy concerning invasion of privacy (not to mention the odd cry of "police state" as well). One of the interesting points I thought was the notion of security: quite simply with the information on this card, were it stolen somehow, could you be charged with a crime you didn't commit because of ID fraud? A nice example is that of the fingerprint. I believe, although I may be wrong, that the card will contain a scan of your fingerprint which were it to fall into the wrong hands (pun not intended) be used to create false prints during a crime. For example, your finger print can be made into a contour plot which can be used to make a mould for a rubber finger with your unique print on it. This could then be used by a thief as a cover for their own prints. (Obviously forensic policing is much more advanced that this but it serves a simplistic example.) The argument given against this risk is that only a portion of the data is recorded (think of your finger print as being a whole string of 0s and 1s and then only using say every third digit) so the whole finger print could never be recovered. In theory.

However, this isn't quite true. Mathematicians have developed techniques similar to noise filtering which enable one to reconstruct and image from a partial signal (in this instance the portion of print data). Moreover, they then used this to create a rubber finger whose print was indistinguishable from the owners.

Now, I should make it plain, that I'm not intentionally scare mongering here. My interest in this issue is the tendency for governments to ignore their scientific advisers in favour of their own agenda - irrespective of the facts. The US administration has been guilty of this recently as well with regards to such topics as climate change etc.

The politicisation of science is an immensely important issue I think. Historically it's given us the atom bomb and currently it's paying for the multinational LHC project at CERN. It's something to think about. The issue de jour is "should creationism be taught in science classes in schools" and clearly the answer is no, but because of the double whammy of the politicisation of education and science we're almost at a stage where there is a non-negligible "yes" movement. Which brings me nicely to the Republican running mate where I'll hand over to a celebrity for a quotation:

"It's like a really bad Disney movie. You know? The hockey mom, 'Oh I'm just a hockey mom from Alaska,' and she's the PRESIDENT, and it's like she's facing down Vladamir Putin and using the folksy stuff she learned at the hockey rink. It's absurd, it's totally absurd, and I don't understand why more people aren't talking about how absurd it is. It's a terrifying possibility. The fact that we've gotten this far and we're that close to this being a reality is crazy.

I need to know if she really think that dinosaurs were here 4,000 years ago. I want to know that, I really do. Because she's gonna have the nuclear codes." - Matt Damon

Normal operating service will be resumed soon but I'm having a bit of a knackering time at work at the mo' (meetings, preparing lectures, outreach meetings, etc) and this weekend is the manwife's brother's wedding so no chance for any relaxation then either. Still, never mind eh? It should be good fun, especially as I'm the best man's best man and get to help him out of his suit at the end of it ;-)

Have a fabulous weekend all!

Hiya peeps, only me again: Just a brief post to wish you all a happy HNT and to encourage you to take part in Ryan's Jason Dottley/Sordid Lives quiz in the post below. Go and do it, shoo!

Here's me attacking the unpacking at my flat:

Sadly this isn't a clothing optional activity as a lot of the boxes have bloody great big staples on them! As you can see I'm a big fan of the Mr Men (in particular Mr Impossible who has the *best* time).

I'll post a little more tomorrow but I'll leave you with these two exciting factoids about, well, me!

• I spent years and years convinced I hated gin without ever trying any solely because of Orwell's description of "oily Victory gin" in 1984... God, I'm such a tit - gin's great!
• The manwife and I first clapped eyes on each other in our uni's maths department where he was a cool indy PhD student and I was a long haired Hanson lookalike hippy student. We had our first impromptu "date" as a result of having to jointly run away from a woman who was stalking us at the time. We've mutually stalked each other since ;-)

Happy HNT!

1. Where did you meet Del was it love at first site?
Del and I were introduced by a mutual friend (who was one of my best friends). No, not love at first sight, but once we clicked we clicked!

2. Have you always wanted to be an actor?
With the exception of about a year when I considered being a doctor. I have the most unsteady hands so that was nixed rather quickly. I don't even think I could play a doctor!

3. Do you think as a celebrity that your privacy and freedom is a fair price for fame?
Shit, I've had my privacy and freedom on clearance for months now! I think I'll have to answer this question later in life. Right now, I'm fine with the exchange.

4. If you could have anybody on Sordid Lives the series if only for one episode who would that be?
I'm assuming you mean as a guest star and that would have to be Madonna. I don't know what she would do. Maybe she could just play Madonna?

5. Besides your character on the show who is your favorite?
I really love Caroline Rhea's "Noleta" and Beth Grant's "Sissy". But really, a favorite is impossible to determine!

6. In your own words what advice would you give to a young gay actor just getting into the business?
STAY TRUE TO YOU!

Ok now for the contest be the first to answer this question correctly and you will win a either a copy of Sordid Lives the movie or a Sordid Lives coffee mug your choice.
The question is..............

Name Jason's two favorite holidays?

I just want to say thanks Jason for taking time to do this interview!

Don't forget that Sordid Lives the Series is on Logo tonight!






Later from Tampa Bay!

Lets see try 2 finish a post without leavin things 2 guess. How about I just finish with one I left hangin last week. My doctor visits first off my immune system is weak right now they say very weak. I've been takin my meds but I guess some of my other actives are not makin the meds work right. They want me to stay home rest and let my immune system catch up with me but that's so damn hard! The hearing that doctor says its getting worse and I knew that i was told when I was little the older I get the worse it would get but also he told me some of my actives are not helping either well damn! The aids I have know kinda look like this but the if I keep losing my hearing u know whats next ugh! Guess that's it for today I need 2 get ready for work and I have one mother of a hang over! Ok now the bossy faghags can jump my ass now!Oh Bob you have a blog? Why are you scared to share that with us? Scared we will trash it out come on Bob we wouldn't if it's good it's good we would let you know. So come on and place nice and share I'm sure you were taught how 2 share right?

Tomorrow I have that interview with Jason Dottley (Ty from Sordid Lives) it's pretty good I think and also he's help with my trivia question and somebody will win a copy of Sordid Lives the Movie or a Sordid Lives coffee mug so tune in for that!

Later from Tampa Bay!

Like I said before sometimes you just hear a song and it describes how you feel inside this is one of those songs. Sorry Bob another insider guess got 2 know me 2 understand this post!
Later from Florida!

Ok I know this story is kinda old but I just now got around 2 writing about it. I in the past I was trying to help someone see why its not a good idea 2 get into porn and this story is just another reason why not 2. Now I am not coming down on Kurt or anybody else that does it I just think it's a bad idea that's all and I don't think the money is all that good and this story kinda proves that. I don't know really just thinking selling your body always comes back someway 2 bite you in the ass trust me I know this. The other thing that gets me on Kurt is he is str8 or says he is and he's married with 3 kids and does gay for pay well he must not be getting paid very well that he's working at a subway thats all I'm sayin. Guys if your thinking about doing it or doing it on webcams just think about it ok it never goes away once you do it!


Gay porn star Kurt Wild can't make enough money to pay his bills by getting laid for the camera, so he definitely needs a day job. The problem is that he's been fired from the Subway Sandwich shop where he works after being recognized as a gay porn star.

A customer recognized Wild and threatened to boycott the Subway outside of St. Louis if Kurt wasn't fired, the manager of the store gave the gay pornster the boot.

Wild wrote in an e-mail:

Hey everyone.

I just wanted to tell everyone that I was just fired from my work at subway because I have done gay porn. A customer said they wouldn't even eat there at subway anymore because of my past work and said that if I wasn't fired then they would boycott the store. What I say is, if one person can try to ruin me everywhere I work... maybe I should take a stand and boycott their store too if they can't let people's privacy be treated right. I should have the right to work anywhere I can and it isn't right or fair that people can keep me from working simply because of a "gay" issue. If a girl did what we do it would probably be ok.. and if a guy does straight porn.. he is bragged about. When I do gay porn, I feel a bit lynched for the rest of my life. Not right. Thanks for reading. - Kurt Wild

Sure gives you something to think about don't ya think?
Have a good weekend!
Later from Florida!

Gaysocialites.com
Men of Porn Kurt Wild

Today has been trying. In essence, I feel as though I've been fighting a battle of wits against an unarmed man... However, something completely unrelated to the aforementioned tedium happened that turned out to be pretty funny (I may be playing a little loose with the term "funny"): The wife of my mentor introduced herself to me today and said "oh yes, you're the one with the earring." Apparently, she can remember her husband coming home on the day the department had its first pierced student and now I'm their first pierced staff member. Hard to believe in 2008 but nonetheless true. The times they are a-changin' etc etc.


So, in honour of that meeting I give you the following HNT and my apologies for not shaving before I took the photo...

Sorry about the somewhat unruly nature of my meagre chest topiary.

In keeping with the briefly revealing theme of HNT I thought it might be fun if I also "revealed" some facts about myself thus giving you guys a chance to get to know me a bit better. So, if we get any interesting questions I'll endeavour to answer them alongside an HNT snap in the future. Anyone game? Like a timid hooker, all requests will be considered but not all will be acted on! I'll start the ball rolling with the following two exciting free facts from my life:

1. I was asked to leave my CU;
2. I swallow...

So, there you go. Free facts. Go forth and do with them what you will.

Ok Ya'll know how much I love Sordid Lives the Movie and the Series well I Jason Dottley who plays Ty on the show gave me a personal thanks today on his vblog and he made me cry! A good cry it's nice to know that the people of Sordid Lives the series care about there fans and will go that little extra for them. Also I have been in contact with Jason and he has agreed to do an interview! I am so happy right now you should see my grin. The interview I should have next week depends on Jason schedule I told him when ever its best for him coz I wasn't in any hurry I know he has all kinds of people pulling at him. So if you haven't seen the show shame on you if you have thanks we need to support them so it will have a second season. Also I know some of you don't have Logo but the movie you can get at amazon.com also I am trying to come up with some kind of trivia question when I do the interview and I will personally give away a copy of Sordid Lives the movie it will be like the 3rd or 4th I have gave away to a reader but it's all good!

Again Thanks so much Jason!
We Love your Sordid Lives!





Later from Florida!
Oh I'll have a post tomorrow maybe about the doc appointments!

I thought I would post tonight coz tomorrow I have a busy day and don't know if I'll have a chance. What I am doing is doctors appointments it's time for my 3 month check up's. Don't worry I am feeling well and haven't had any hospitals stays in a while thank God! But I hate going 2 doctors anyway but it's something I have 2 do. Having a weak Immune system really sucks but I have dealt with so far in my life. I also have 2 go and have my ears tested again and I think I'll be getting new hearing aids coz these ones I have either suck or my hearing is getting worse I'm not sure what but it's something. I also want 2 address something that was said last week I know I come on here do post and not give all the details going on most the time it involves other people so I can't coz I don't like giving names of people that might not want there name blog about. Some it is coz even tho I open my life up 2 the public and blog about it I still like 2 keep some private so I only blog a little about it. Those who know me personally know the rest of the story and I'm sorry I can't just spill it all I am sorry that it upsets some of you. I will let ya'll know what the doctors say and I hope I don't lose any readers or upset any f you coz I do keep some things private.

Later from Florida!

Update:
Don't forget tonight on logo sordid lives the series make sure you watch one of the best shows on TV and Jason who plays Ty is awesome I'm gonna try 2 get him on here for an interview I have talked with him next time I'm gonna ask him. Jason's Mom for the record is an awesome lady and I just loved her so! She raised Jason like my Mom did me and she has been so nice 2 me! Watch the show people it's worth it! Info coming on my doctors appointments I'm off 2 the ear doctor!

Over the weekend I found out that I had been on the receiving end of some good old fashioned homophobia. In a couple of weeks the manwife and I shall be attending his brothers wedding and have booked ourselves, along with his mum, into a hotel near the registry office. It turns out that we hadn't given all the necessary details for the booking so the hotelier contacted the manwife's brother who gave over our details only to be told that they didn't accept bookings for gay couples. Needless to say we were unimpressed. To make matters worse, when he enquired why they didn't want us they gave the following explanation: Apparently a couple of years ago a male lawyer had booked a room for "use" with his young male companion and they'd wrecked the room and this had caused "a bit of a mess" both to the room and the hotel's reputation. Surely the policy should be no more lawyers?! The manwife's brother was furious on our behalf and gave them a piece of his mind (this man would be a black-belt-jedi-ninja in the gay-straight alliance I think) and has transferred all our business, mother inc., to another less loony hotel.

Aside from the remote homophobia the weekend was lovely. I spent in with the manwife, catching up with old friends and lounging about his flat in various states of undress. Bliss.

And because I have to go grocery shopping this evening:

(sourced from xkcd.com).



Hope you all had a super lovely weekend and that this week is suitably fabulous!

A rare Sunday post from me I know but I have a question.

Am I 2 old 2 have a crush on a boy?

Hope Ya'll having a good Sunday back 2 nascar 4 me!
Later from Florida!

I'm not sure what I am doing posting about this but for some strange reason it's on my mind and I feel the need 2 write about it so here it goes. When I was in school the 6th grade I think maybe 7th I'm not sure now but anyway it was one of those grades. This took place in shop class I still don't get why everyone has to take shop class just like I don't understand why everyone has 2 take home economics. I was in shop class and we were gonna build this car out of some kind of metal and we had 2 bring in 2 bucks for the tires but the rest was free. I thought ok this should be easy so there was a few patterns we had 2 choose from so I pick one out and we trace the pattern and everything we needed 2 cut it out and start building are cars. Well all the other boys and a few girls rush over 2 the machine that u needed 2 cut the pattern out with the teacher also had hand cutters for some of the other stuff we had 2 cut with well I thought I would use them until the other machine was open for me 2 use.

Well back then I was a tiny kid and all my power was really in my legs I had a heck of a time with them snips but I gave it all anyway. Well the other boys was watching me like they always do and decided 2 keep me away from the machine as long as they could and even when the bell rang one of them was staying over helping the teacher in the shop class and said he would cut mine out and have it ready for me tomorrow I should have know better but I always gave people the chance. Well the next day when I got 2 that class the cut my pattern out but they cut things 2 long and some 2 short and then told the teacher that I cut it myself. He told me 2 fix it the best I could but I wasn't gonna waste his material. I was so pissed off at myself and these boys but I knew I couldn't do anything about it. There was 2 many of them and only me and I have been down that road before so I knew better.

The worse was yet 2 come I use what I could find 2 make my car look as good as I could but it still look like shit. The next day we get 2 paint them and them at the end of the week we would be graded on them. Well I showed up ready 2 paint my car and the boys of the class corner me and as soon as the teacher walked away they said I was 2 paint my car pink and yellow and if I didn't they would get me in gym class. I was so mad and upset but I knew I couldn't do anything coz if I told the teacher I would get it later. I felt if I said something when I got home Dad would be upset with me and if I didn't do it I knew these boys would strip me in gym class again or worse. So I did the only thing I could and that was paint the car pink and yellow. At the end of the week the teacher graded my car he gave me and F said I didn't even try and I was being smart by painting it pink. All I can do now is laugh about it. Funny thing is I still have this car I kept it just 2 remind no matter what they did they didn't break me came close but didn't break me.

Anyway have a good weekend!
Later from Florida!

I remember that day do you? I will never forget will you?

Later from Florida!

So over the next few hours the team at the CERN will slowly feed a beam of protons around the giant loop 27km of LHC (at about 11000 laps per second). When it's all up and running two beams will fire around the LHC toward each other and impact on each other at immense energies will endeavour to recreate the initial conditions of the Big Bang. When these two proton beams impact on each other then the protons will be broken down into its constituent parts which will then recombine and been splattered through detectors like ATLAS.

Well have you missed me? I have been thru hell and back well for me anyway. Then I spent a little time feeling sorry for myself and then all of the sudden I was flipping thru the tv and bam I seen a cutie and thought let me stay here for a bit. It was Zac Efron and what a hottie huh? Anyway he was in one of the high school musical things he did I'm not sure what one but the song he was singing hit me like a brick and I just had 2 find it online and I did and I listen 2 it over and over and I said this is my song. Of course I put the video on the blog and did up myspace with it also I am totally into this song right now. There is a lot that has happen some I anit gonna talk about now so just deal for now ok. I know I hate leavin ya'll hangin but sometimes its for the best for all of us.

I will tell ya about Saturday night tho coz I got a little sideways. My neighbor and good friend Daniel come over about 8 I think it was told me 2 get dressed we were going out! I was like I don't want 2 go anywhere he wasn't gonna take no for an answer so I got up and got dressed and we went out on the town. It's kinda strange honest coz he is not a club person. When we got 2 the club it was different lookin didn't have all the people running in and out we walk in it was kinda laid back type place. I was like this is cool coz I didn't really want 2 go in the first place most the people in the club were older but I have never minded that I always seem 2 get along better with older people anyway. They had karaoke going on and most everybody in the club was doing songs so I order a drink and follow Daniel 2 a seat.

Daniel told me that the single guys would be on me coz guys my age don't come in that much. Boy he was right next thing I knew I had like 10 drinks in front of me guys buying drinks like crazy. I thought they were sweet and I tried 2 dance with everyone that bought me a drink. I also got up and did some karaoke and I have 2 admit had one of the best times ever and yes I wasn't feeling any pain! There was this one guy who was super sweet and made sure with Daniel that everyone was playing nice with me coz of the state I was in I couldn't do it myself. I had such a great time that I made Daniel go back last night we didn't stay as long and I didn't get drunk but I had a good buzz going and I knew it was time 2 leave when we did or I would have been in trouble. Anyway that was my weekend pretty much I need 2 get my ass 2 work!

Later from Florida!

Woo hoo! Just ordered a digital camera which hopefully will be here in time for HNT...

I spent most of the weekend with the manwife catching up with some former housemates from when I used to live in Sussex. We met in a real spit & sawdust type pub, that I absolutely love, and caught up on the past six or so years and chewed the fat. After a moderate period of defilement the conversation drifted to the lipstick bulldog Palin and the Republicans upstaging of team-Obama. Naturally we only get a very Europeanised coverage of events but it does seem to me that she was a real knee-jerk reaction of a nomination cynically designed to be a) cover the blue colour vote that McCain doesn't appeal to and b) regain some "liberal points" from the Democrats. I'd love it if somebody would fill me in on the actual state of affairs on the ground, what's the public perception of her nomination?

In other news, I spent a bit of time with my parents over the weekend which reminded me of an incident on a family holiday last month. My sister and I were in the kitchen of our holiday apartment and her husband was husband outside lighting a bbq in the rain (because we were in Britain). I commented that her husband was a "good guy" to which my sister immediately quipped: "Hands off!" which I thought was brilliant. :-) Every time I hear other peoples stories of how difficult their comings out were I'm always grateful that my family have been pretty fantastic about it. Bless 'em.

Isn't it funny how the right song comes along and bam says it all!
Thanx Zac!
Later from Florida!

Well, I'm a few days into the new job and ye gads am I looking forward to the weekend! Not that the job is terrible - but at the weekend I get to see the manwife and I've been missing him terribly.

Well, what is my shiny new job I hear you cry? Well, I've landed myself a university teaching fellowship back in the UK! Woo hoo! *does the dance of job joy* It's only a three year position but it's far better than floating from one-year contract to one-year contract that seemed to be the pattern in Ireland. Hopefully this (greater) stability will enable the manwife and I to think about sensible things like joining the property ladder and slipping an altogether different type of rings onto our fingers...

In the meanwhile I better crack on rewriting the version of the student manual for Maple we give our undergraduates - as you can see my job isn't quite as glamorous as Ryan's - so toodle pip!

Later from Florida!

Later from Florida!